Friday, February 12, 2010

It's always ugly in Philadelphia: a Rookie-style game preview

As the world gears up for the Olympics, the Montreal Canadiens are getting ready for back-to-back games against the Phildelphia Flyers. (No opening ceremonies for star players like Markov and Halak, I guess.)

Instead of giving you all kinds of information on what the team's done since the Winter Classic, who cuckolded who, and which players are the ones to watch (y'know, Ray Emery's one of the most talented black players in the NHL, Jeff Carter made it to the Team Canada roster in the nick of time), I'm going to focus on something a bit more obvious.

This team is ugly. I know that female hockey fans are often judged because people think we only watch the sport because we like cute boys or whatever, and don't get me started on snap judgments and generalizations, but here I can't help but say the opposite as loudly as I can.
Honestly, I think the Philadelphia Flyers might be the fugliest team in hockey.
Their style of play is ugly - they don't call them the Broad Street Bullies for nothing. Their jerseys and their logo are complete eyesores. And let's be honest, their team photo isn't going to wind up in the pages of Tiger Beat anytime soon. Mike Richards is one of those twentysomethings that seems to enjoy looking like a forty-year-old suburbanite. Dan Carcillo looks like the kind of guy you'd see on Cops. Chris Pronger's got a weird-ass face, which reminds Czechtacular of some weird, post-sex-change, roid-raging Madonna. And if asked to describe Scott Hartnell, I'm not sure whether I'd go with "vomit-inducing Lord of the Rings type of Viking dude" or tell people he's the origin of the phrase "beat you like a red-headed stepchild."

In normal-looking hockey team news, Carey Price starts tonight.

Thoughts? Are the Flyers the ugliest team in hockey?
And are the Habs going to beat them like... well, you know?

1 comment:

  1. this is an amazing game preview
    ... and i completely agree, so fugly.


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