Sunday, January 16, 2011

Plus/Minus gets chatty again

All-Stars, superheroes, surgeries, spin-o-ramas, and goalies doing gangsta poses. Did I write a hockey soap opera, or is this real life?

PLUS
+ Benoit Pouliot was good at hockey this week.
+ Carey Price is an All-Star! It made me so happy that at first I didn't even realize that Norris Trophy nominee Drew Doughty is not an All-Star. Quite a few All-Star guys that I'll be very happy to see on the ice together in two weeks. (I keep trying to choose my ideal winger for the Sedin twins, and can't decide!)
+ Alex Auld is pretty great against the Rangers. It's not just luck.
+ Dwayne Roloson's new mask (you know, for his Tampa Bay Lightning job that he unfortunately stole from C├ędrick) is one of the nicest goalie masks in the NHL.
+ I think my New York Jets may just have won a playoff game. I might be imagining it, though.
+ Despite the fact that I'm not his biggest fan, I'm giving Aaron Sorkin a Plus for giving me a new catchphrase at the Golden Globes: "Smart girls have more fun."

MINUS
You guys should follow @kuyaz on Twitter just because he makes things like this sometimes.
- No, Marc-Andre Fleury, I didn't think your little pose was playful and fun. I might have thought that if you weren't such a massive douchetard, but them's the breaks.
- Gotta admit, I'm kind of squeamish, so I'm not always in the mood to see injuries and scars and stuff. I tried to avoid seeing pictures of the surgery scar on Andrei Markov's knee, but it was right there on the Habs Inside/Out homepage. Not cool, guys. It hurts me enough to remember that my favourite Hab is injured.
- I'm pretty sure I've made some variation on this rant at least once already this season: who let Mike Cammalleri get sick? You're telling me that one of the NHL's most profitable teams doesn't have money for Purell or to pay people to walk around holding up sneezeguards in front of players?
- Is there anyone left in this universe who still likes PK Subban? Poor rookie has haters all over the place. You'd think Matt Cooke started sending out blank cheques. (PS: This week I found out what a slew foot is... and seriously, THAT'S one of the dirtiest moves in hockey? Whose grandparents decided this? Was PK's slew foot on Dubinsky just a weak example, or was I not watching closely enough? Because I've seen way worse, both from NHL players and from girls at weddings trying to catch the bouquet.)
- Dear every player in the NHL: Maybe you didn't get my last memo, but there's a limit to corporate sponsorships and endorsement deals, ok? I know some of you don't listen to me, but it's one thing to endorse a company whose products you believe in and they send you free stuff, but it's another to have logos and company names splashed across your clothes or to show up in every other commercial I see. And yes, I'll keep telling you this until I get what I want. Okay? Okay. Thanks. Sincerely, Rookie.
- Henrik Lundqvist: You know what you did.

NEITHER A PLUS NOR A MINUS
Spin-o-ramas during shootouts. A skater should be allowed to do whatever he wants as he skates up to the net, because, after all, shootouts are there for our entertainment. (If they weren't, there would still be more than five minutes of overtime.) There's a limit, though, and as much as I love Mason Raymond he showed me what that limit is this week. I'm sorry, MayRay, but you shouldn't commit goalie interference with your butt.

AND STAY TUNED FOR
This is a shameless plug, because I never know what I'll say on the radio but I sometimes know what I'll be writing about, so I might as well promote what I can control. A Plus to this week's SNL Digital Short, which I'll write about soon for BetterWithPopcorn.com, and a Minus to our NHL Guardian, the Canadien, which I'll snark on soon for AllHabs.net.

5 comments:

  1. I said something nice about Matt Cooke this week in my blog. Does that make me a plus or a minus? Or just an idiot?

    Having been at the game I can confidently say that Marc Andre Fleury's rip off of Pricer's Pose was sad. He is, in fact, a douche. However, he cannot touch Lundqvist on the scale of doucheness, because how can anyone be a bigger douche than a guy who can surpass the hate level of Habs fans for Sean Avery? That is some serious doucheness right there.

    I've decided to hate Lundqvist second, right after Eric Staal whom I'll never forgive for Markov EVER!

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  2. I've come to the conclusion that the Penguins have a giant log up their collective arseholes, and their "world is against us" crap is hilarious.

    And anyone who hates Subban is a douche. Or jealous. Or both.

    Also while people are raising eyebrows at goalies complaining about the spin-o-rama: there's a rule clearly backing them up. Forward motion, like Grabovski's shootout spin was perfectly executed. Linus Omark was with forward motion. Mason Raymond was not. And there are rules for penalty shots that clearly defined Stamkos' on Price as illegal. But refs can barely distinguish a proper hooking penalty so I won't hold my breath on them actually having the balls to properly call back a failed spin-o-rama move. (Though they apparently have the wherewithal to remember a barely known obscure footnote regarding waving off a goal where a highstick was involved despite the fact the goalie or anyone else whacked it into their own net when it involves the Habs... Pens know NOTHING on that "world is against us" crap). Why bother having rules if no one really follows them, or selectively follows them. *cough*Stunndqvist's blocker punch*cough*

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  3. Tyg: I think I can maybe forgive one nice comment, because there are probably worse people out there in the universe, like dictators and anyone who works at LAX. But it's good to know that my goalie rage has some sort of basis! Lundqvist really let me down. I would expect that kind of behaviour from a lesser goaltender, but not from him. Maybe some of that John Tortorella crazy rubbed off?

    Number31: Thanks for clearing up that there is an actual rule, and that not all spin-o-ramas are the same. They certainly didn't look like it. And you're right, the Penguins kind of sound like that one girl we all know who acts like her life is so hard because she's too pretty.

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  4. I'm really late on this but I have two things to say.

    1. About the spinorama: It's legal, and the rule actually says: "The spin-o-rama type move where the player completes a 360° turn as he approaches the goal, shall be permitted as this involves continuous motion." So as I understand it, it's not even a question of "forward" motion. The only issue I have with it in the shootout is when the players basically rams into the goalie. That shouldn't be allowed. Otherwise, I think it's fair. There was actually a great article posted on the goalie guild dealing with how goalies should adjust to it.

    2. You cracked me up with the slew foot thing. Maybe that's because I never played hockey, and maybe it's actually way more dangerous than it looks like, but I find it hilarious that this innocuous looking move is randomly called the "dirtiest play in hockey" and provokes so much outrage. I would have thought crosschecking someone in the face, or boarding someone from behind was dirtier. Apparently not.

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  5. THANK YOU, Greg. I thought that most of what we saw from the Buffalo Sabres last night looked worse than PK's slewfoot.

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