Five years.

Five years ago today, on Tuesday, March 13th, 2007, I walked into the Bell Centre wearing a Canadiens T-shirt. For the first time.

My friend Caroline offered me her extra ticket to a Habs-Islanders game. We sat in the Club Desjardins section, thanks to her dad's corporate season tickets. I bought my Koivu shirt that day. Koivu was awarded the Molson Cup for the previous month. The Habs won.

I still don't think I know everything about hockey, but I definitely know more than I did before that game. Back then, Czechtacular and I were just friends-in-law: our mutual friends joked to me that she could teach me everything I needed to know about the Habs before I went to the game. I took them seriously. My Facebook message to her was answered with a series of messages that, when printed out, took up three pages. She answered everything from "Does Guy Carbonneau hate Russians?" to "Are there midfielders in hockey?" to "I know some of the guys' jersey numbers but who are the rest of them?"

Yeah. I wasn't kidding with this Rookie thing.

Here are a few excerpts from the cheat sheet that Czechtacular wrote up for me five long years ago:

#8, Michael Komisarek [...] basically he just freaking ROCKS. 


#20, Mike Johnson, right wing.


#26, Josh Gorges, defense. We just got him at the trade deadline in exchange for Craig Rivet so I don't know too much about him. He's just "the new guy."


#30, David Aebischer, goalie. [...] He tends to flop all around his crease... (I had no idea what any of those words meant.)

#32, Mark Streit, defense/winger. He's come into his own this year.


#35, Tomas Plekanec, centre. Uhm this paragraph may be long because he's my favourite player. (She wasn't joking, either. It's a hell of a paragraph. I learned so much about Tomas Plekanec that day.)

I read and re-read those pages throughout the day, and took them with me to the game. A lot has change in the last five years: New guy Josh Gorges is now one of the most important players on the team. Captain and Molson Cup winner Saku Koivu just played his 1000th NHL game. I've learned more than a few things about hockey. The team, the fans who have so graciously taught me everything I know about the game, and I have grown and changed a lot in these five years.

In an interesting twist of fate, I get to walk into the Bell Centre again tonight. Thank you, Black Keys, for scheduling a concert on Tuesday, March 13th. It'll feel like coming home.

Playing catch-up

You know those days where everything happens? I feel like Habs fans had two of those in a row.

I'd love to sit here and lie and say I watched Wednesday's Bruins game live, but I had a rivalry of my own to take on that night: "Rookie vs. All-You-Can-Eat Sushi." A friend of mine was in town, and even though she grew up in Massachusetts she was hoping for a Habs win. We had a blast swapping Bell Centre stories and saying "TD Banknorth Garden" in the most ridiculous Boston accents we could muster. (Apparently the rule is that if it doesn't offend your ears, it's not a real Mass accent.) My phone kept buzzing with Twitter updates from Dave Stubbs, so all I knew was that some crazy stuff was going down at TD Banknorth Gahhhden. Eventually I put it on silent, because there was unlimited sushi to be eaten, and Jackson, The Only Boy At Dinner, put his Habs hat on for good luck. He would later excuse himself from tea to watch Canadiens Express. I can never pass up a good cup of Davids Tea and an hour with my non-biological family, and it turns out I was wise to get a good night's sleep and wait until morning to catch up on what I had missed. Because HOLY CRAP WHAT A GAME!

Anyone who says that only idiots like high-scoring games probably ate their words after what might be the best Habs-Bruins game I've ever seen. Some great fights, and some non-fights, pretty much reminded everyone that Original Six rivalries might be the best kind of rivalry. As much as I love Carey Price, I'm glad that his encounter with Tim Thomas wasn't an actual fight. Tim Thomas probably threw a punch or two in his youth, and if he'd managed to land a blow on Carey Price he'd have to incur my wrath. And, much like his black and yellow jersey, it would not have been pretty.

While I was catching up on that game, the absolute best (although a little belated) news was announced. My boy Ryan White was back. I've been waiting for this news ever since he'd been sent back down two weeks ago. I will not dwell on the fact that he wasn't a Hab when I was at the Bell Centre last week, and that he will hopefully still be a Hab when I have Bulldogs tickets on February 25th. I'm willing to look past that, though, because Ryan White is a Hab again.

It felt kinda like this

Oh, and undisclosed number of injuries after the Bruins game and because we're at that point in the season.

Having to work late means I missed most of the Islanders game as well, so I didn't get to see any Habs goals, I missed the epic Ryan White assist, and I wasn't able to post this on time:

I just got to watch the Islanders score, then win a shootout. I guess that's their reward for giving us Jamie Wiz.
Some days you just can't win. In this case I'm not sure if I'm talking about the Habs or myself. Luckily with a Habs Tweetup tomorrow during Hockey Day In Canada, I know for sure that I'll be able to watch my Habs.

Plus/Minus is not going to make a "Boxing Day" pun

Hope you all had a great Christmas, even if you don't celebrate it. Plus/Minus is a little short this week because sometimes I talk too much, so I'm giving my dear readers the gift of brevity.

PLUS

+ It's always nice when Team Canada wins their first game. This applies to both the World Juniors and the Spengler Cup, where former Hab Glen Metropolit is playing for Canada. (Bonus plus: I now kind of know what the Spengler Cup is!)
+ David Desharnais named AHL's First Star of the Week!
+ Andrei Kostitsyn scored a goal, to shut up all the haters. And Alexandre Picard has been making himself useful as well, which I guess should shut me up.

MINUS

- Lost to the New York Islanders. You know what hurts? Watching your Habs lose to the Islanders, then seeing the highlights three times on Sportscentre.
- Okay, I take it back. That probably didn't hurt as much as whatever mystery ailment is plaguing Josh Gorges. I've known for a while that things aren't going well for Josh, but now he isn't playing well, and Dave Stubbs reported that he left practice limping. I do not like any of this. At all.
- I almost forgot about that game against the Dallas Stars, but then I remembered. I wish I hadn't. (Aside: Conan was really funny that night, as I found out the next day.)
- I wasn't going to complain about anything I saw on 24/7, because I didn't want the show to hold back. But Matt Hendricks' bloody eye was a little tough to look at for extended periods of time. And Crosby's cup was the kind of thing that would have made me nauseous, if I hadn't known about it in advance and shielded my eyes.

What awesome Christmas gifts did you all get? Or give?
I went for a walk early last week in the cold (I just needed to move a bit and clear my mind), spent some time wandering around Centennial Plaza, and got the sniffles a few days later. The Montreal Canadiens are no good at Christmas presents.

Short fuse on Long Island

If I were the New York Islanders, I'd be mad too. Their biggest accomplishment this season is snapping the Maple Leafs' winning streak. In overtime. Otherwise, there's nothing really special going on in Long Island. Their record is okay. They've had their share of injuries already. They lost a player to a suspension (would you call it "lewd behaviour" or just the suggestion thereof?). And, they got subtly jabbed again on 30 Rock. Iit's not easy being the New York Islanders. Sometimes you have to resort to desperate measures.

I'm not the first person to discuss this ad, nor will I be the last. There are some great comments being posted about it over at All Habs that are worth a read.
This ad couldn't be more obvious in targeting the Canadiens' fans, rather than the team. This ad could have easily featured a picture of many other things: just a Canadiens logo or jersey, a moment from a previous game between the two teams, a player (maybe former NY Ranger Scott Gomez, or rookie-spearing Mike Cammalleri), or a sea of enthusiastic Isles fans (if that exists). Instead, they chose a picture of three youngish male Habs fans in jerseys, with wigs and scruffy facial hair. The majority of people who see this splash page, even if they're sitting in bed with their laptop, will probably think these guys look a little obnoxious. Even the placement of the Great Orange Circle Of No allows us to see all of their faces.

It's just like a negative political campaign, the kind we often see in the United States (for basically any sort of election). I guess it makes sense that in sports, you'd want to cheer for the team playing against a team that you don't like. (Isn't that why everyone who isn't a Yankees fan wants the Texas Rangers to beat the Yankees? ...ugh, no more baseball talk.) However, it seems that the main reason for making the Canadiens the enemy is because of their fans. Which makes sense, I guess, since Habs fans have a bad reputation, but what's the use in disliking a team if you won't boo their players?

Then there's the oh-so-original slogan, "No Habs No". Yeah, they're the first ones to come up with that. What's next, are they going to run an ad campaign with a picture of Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes wearing an Islanders shirt and peeing on a Habs logo? That would be a breakthrough in advertising. They'd probably have to hire a fancy ad agency all the way in Manhattan to come up with that one.

Under the world's snappiest slogan reads "Show the Canadiens that this is Islanders country." Is it just me, or does that sound a little creepy? It's the kind of thing I'd expect to hear if I was in some type of backwoods swampy area, and I accidentally walked on some creepy old man's lawn, and he's sitting on his decrepit porch wearing beaten-up overalls, chewing tobacco, and holding a shotgun. "You best git away, Canadiens girlie! We don't want yer kind. This here's ISLANDERS COUNTREH." And as I try to run away as fast as my little legs will take me, I swear I hear yodeling and banjos. "But this is New York! The Great Gatsby took place here! I don't understand why they talk like this! And I like John Tavares!" I'd think to myself as I ran for my life.

A rivalry is a great way to sell tickets. But I think the Islanders marketing team might be reaching a little far with this one. Unless, of course, they're trying to rile up Habs fans, hoping that more of us come out of the woodwork. After all, a seat filled is a seat filled. Whether it's filled by a mullet-wigged Habs fan or a banjo-playing Isles fan shouldn't really matter.

happy? birthday.

You only know two things for sure in this life: that predicting the outcome of a Habs game is impossible and that somehow, Nicolas Cage will continue to make movies.

No, I don't know why people keep casting Nicolas Cage, come on people, it's 2010.

No, I don't know why the Canadiens are unpredictable either. It's understandable at this point in the season, when it's safe to assume that the players are tired and/or injured (and let's face it, "injured" isn't news to us this season). We can call this one an almost-win (you know, like an almost-goal, except for a whole game).  Things were going well enough for us until the last two minutes of the game, henceforth known as "please, hockey gods, PLEASE don't ruin this for me, I swear I'll be a better blogger if you just help me out here" time.

imagine this kitty wearing a tiny Habs jersey

Jaroslav Halak played almost as well as he usually does, but I'm a little scared that fatigue is setting in. Also, now that the rest of the league has caught on to how awesome he is, you know that other teams are working extra hard on figuring out how to scale mount KilimanJaro. I think we just found the dark cloud to our silver lining. (But I don't doubt for a second that Jaro's going to remedy this somehow.)

That shootout kind of hurt to watch. Still, I hope it doesn't ruin Max Lapierre's mojo. If he's back to his usual fine form, then it couldn't have come at a better time. Having a guy hit a hot streak at the end of a season is like having a designated driver: sure, he's less fun when everyone else is going crazy, but push comes to shove he's the guy taking everyone home when they're just a bit too ruined to get anywhere without him.

So, I'm sorry, Hal and Travis, that we couldn't follow through on an awesome birthday gift. But you can share your b-day disappointment with okay director Barry Levinson, noted comic actor Paul Rudd,  wicked awesome Zach Braff (maybe a Habs fan, and if he's not then he'll be an easy convert probably), former Hab wife DJ Tanner Candace Cameron Bure, sitcom star and Pixar go-to guy John Ratzenberger, and (I saved the best for last) Billy Dee Williams. So really, it sucks that the Habs lost, but at least two of them share a birthday with Lando Calrissian.

One Island, Two Teams: Game Preview 12-19-09

(Cut me some slack with the title. I don't even remember the last time I did one of these.)


Oh right, picture.

Scary! Or maybe not. The message here should be "beat us, and watch out for your equipment van." But that's slightly too ominous (and fire isn't funny, kids) so we'll stick with these two simple words:

ANDREI MARKOV!

In addition to this much-awaited comeback, there may be hope for another Czech sausage pass, as Roman Hamrlik may also make a return to the lineup tonight. There are too many conflicting reports of that in my Gmail inbox so I will merely shrug my shoulders and wait until 7:08 like the rest of you.

Also making the trip is Superman er, Brian Gionta. It's like Santa took a giant sparkly box with a CH logo and gave a piece of it to every Canadiens' fan.

As for the Islanders, they are young, they are motivated, and definitely not to be taken lightly, even if the last two games against them have been W's for the Habs' record. Both teams are starved for offense lately, with the top guns having slowed down their points pace (save Andrei Kostitsyn, the man responsible for 63% of the Habs' goals over the span of the last four games).

So now we talk about them Islanders

• For those hiding under a rock for the last three years, the young man pictured up there is John Tavares. He's going to want to get fired up again, as his last contribution to the scoresheet was an assist in a win against Boston last week. He seems to like Saturday night games, as 11 of his 27 points have been on Saturdays.
• Blake Comeau, for his part, showed he did not enjoy his recent time in the pressbox. Of the last four games he's suited up for recently, he's registered a point in three of them.
• Frans Nielsen was a key in Thursday night's loss against the Rangers with one goal, one assist.
• Ex-Hab mention in today's column of course goes to Mark Streit, who despite the rough go he seems to be having this season is always somebody to look out for, especially with Montreal's recent penalty-taking tendencies.

Little girl, no more.

So I had started thinking that this game post was going to resemble a protest against what is likely to result in a hemorrage of printed nonsense about "goaltending controversies" and how we may now have one on our hands because apparently, it is probably the worst thing ever to actually be in possession of two solid goaltenders, but there is a much more important issue to address.

Tomas Plekanec.

Well, lookit you, Mr. Badass.

Before going further I must underline and applaud the play of Travis Moen tonight. First star honours were very well deserved in this Méchant Lundi special event (otherwise known as "what, we play tonight? Really?") as well as Hammer for continuing his reign on the offensive masters of the Habs' blueline (outscoring Sheldon Souray by 3 goals. Concussion or not, betcha didn't think THAT was ever going to happen). I've also been a little rough on Jaroslav Spacek lately, and that goal made me eat my words.

So, Pleks. This may well be my area of expertise, granted, he has been my favourite player for awhile (and in my sights since his first-ever training camp in 2001). There have been ups. There have been downs. There have been turtleneck jokes and little girl references (and of course, the accompanying creative uses of Photoshop). There is, currently, a one-year contract, $2.75M.

So far, the man we "overpaid" this summer is looking like the bargain he has been since 2001.

This and he hasn't kept the same wingers for more than two games all season. The silent but wily craftsman is back to being one of the highest on the Habs' leaderboard. Eight of his points are assists, but none of those were cheaply made. Roll back footage of Cammy's second goal on Saturday. He is back and he is strong, he is making use of whatever chances he gets despite the instability on either side of him. He has the odd average game, but the Plekanec definition of "average" still means busting his butt every shift. It's been said before, but doesn't always reach into the thick skulls of some Habs' fans (who tend to favour former wearers of jersey #27, coincidence?) who are off in Trade Rumour La-La Land, pointing at his "rising value" and "the need to capitalize on it" as soon as possible rather than acknowledging and even celebrating the fact that this team we couldn't recognize October 1st actually has a familiar face pulling a lot of its strings. He's even added to the formula a little--this season he's slowly adding the extra spice to his game by attempting the human bulldozer on pretty much every opponent, 5'9'' or 6'7''. Doesn't always win, sometimes ends up flat on his butt, but oh, those fearful little Euro forwards, afraid to get in the corners...not so much.

And tonight. End-to-end setup for Hammer's goal. Those playmaking abilities at their very best, that keen vision of the ice, the confidence he so dearly missed last season, it was all there. One thing hasn't changed with his mindset, though. He passed the puck. I'll always remember being present at the Penguins-Canadiens' game a few years ago, again in overtime, where he could have recorded his first NHL hat trick but saw another #44, Souray, in what he felt was a much better position so he passed the puck to him. Souray scored, the entire Bell Centre and beyond went into a fit of deliriousness, ole'ing deep into the metro (I had to hum along, I had no voice left). Pleks? He stuck by his decision like he probably will again tonight. And then there'll be the next game.

But will there be next year? That's not up to me. But you know what would happen if it was.

A hat trick of Plus/Minuses

I'm trying very hard to write an actual Plus Minus here, and not just turning on Caps Lock and typing CAMMALLERI HAT TRICK until my fingers get numb.

So, this week the Canadiens posted three wins at home, including last night's thriller against the New York Rangers, and in honour of that I'm introducing some pictures to Plus Minus:

PLUS

+ 3 for three consecutive wins, including our first in regulation time

+ the return of Glen Metropolit, which seems to have been some kind of boost to us winning, or at least a pretty impressive coincidence.

+ Scott Gomez gave us three of his best games so far. I'm not claiming I did anything, but this performance streak seems to have started after I watched his One Life To Live video multiple times. (What? I needed a laugh.)

+ Kyle Chipchura definitely earned a plus by playing one of his best games as a Hab last night.

+ Brian Gionta's shootout goal, which introduced a new word into our lexicon...

+ I hate to sound all goofy and egocentric, but can I give a Plus to myself? This week both Hab It Her Way girls invented new adjectives to describe game action: Rookie's "Giontastic" and Czechtacular's "Cammazing," the latter coined after a star turn by...

+ Mike Cammalleri. As mentioned by Red Fisher in today's newspaper, Cammy's been doing very well in his temporary role as assistant captain, and he played some good games against the Thrashers and Islanders, and then THAT HAT TRICK. Wow. To put it briefly, the player who had me making graphics like this during the off-season:

has lived up to my expectations so far:

But obviously, it's not always peaches and cream and Cammalleri.

MINUS

- Are you serious? There's MORE drama to be had on the Sergei Kostitsyn front? Between the rumours that he and Gomez fought, and the Balloon Boy-esque drama that had us wondering if he was halfway back to Europe already, then getting interrupted in mid-thought by the news that no, there is nothing wrong, I've officially grown tired of hearing about athletes pulling diva fits like they're on The Hills or something. (And no, I have never watched that show and I never, ever will.)

- Too many fans and journalists (read: more than zero) talking about a "goalie controversy." I know that wondering who our #1 netminder is gives you something to talk and write about, and that without a competitive spirit there would be no sports, but I still don't get why no one is happy with having two goalies who are young and able to turn out insane saves and wins.

- Chris Higgins' hair. I hate to say anything negative about the guy, but... that hair. It just wasn't good. If he's going to have it at that colour and length, he should at least attempt some kind of Matthew McConaughey brush-back, because that centre part isn't doing anyone any favours.

- Sorry, John Tavares. You probably hate Montreal right now, and I kind of feel bad because you're a good kid and all. Please don't try to exact any revenge on us. Sincerely, a fellow rookie.

Snowy, with a chance of victory

So, about last night...

AWESOME.

And I'll tell you why.

Because we had a strong, motivated team backed by a solid goaltender?

Because we outshot the other team?

Because Scott Gomez had a fire lit under him?

Because our power play is improving?

Because we played against a team that doesn't always have their business together?

No.

Well, yes, okay, yeah, all of those things are true, but no.

You see, I have a lot of crazy theories about why things happen. (It's probably why ~czechtacular spends her days laughing at me. Even though we don't see each other every day.) And you are about to learn one of them:

I don't necessarily believe in the weather as an all-encompassing force that controls all things...

Okay, but I don't want to piss off Storm, she's pretty badass

...but you may have noticed that the Habs' win against the Islanders was a) the first win in regulation time and b) insane. It also happened on the same day as the first snowfall. I know that last week or the week before a few flakes fell, but yesterday there were actual flurries. I don't know about you, but I looked out the window yesterday afternoon, saw all those beautiful white, fluffy flakes gently making their way to the sidewalk, and said "oh shit." That's when you know it's snowing. (The rain cleared up that snow, though. Yay.)

Anyway, crazy things tend to happen on the day of the first snowfall. Case in point: Thursday's game.

I was pretty happy after Tuesday's shootout win, a victory best described as, well, Giontastic*. I knew that things could get better, though, and they did. Our Canadiens didn't just win against the Islanders, they actually played to win and kicked some ass. I had almost forgot what it was like to see such epic ass-kicking.

And I'd go so far as to say that this is some weird natural phenomenon that only happens once a season. Things go crazy when the snow first falls. You don't know what it's going to be, you don't always know when it'll happen, but something unexpected is going to happen.

Look at last season: After about a season and a half of nothing, and a few weeks of really trying for it (including a sacrificed stick), Josh Gorges scores his first goal as a Canadien. (And it was a really nice one!). Also that night, Ryan O'Byrne did the unspeakable, but let's not speak of that. And if you looked outside your window or went outdoors after that game, do you remember what you saw? A thin layer of pristine, sparkling white snow on the ground. Now, it hasn't been proven if that game (also against the Islanders, is that part of the pattern?) was crazy because of the snow, or if Storm decided to celebrate the first Josh goal, but there's something there.

Two seasons, two snowfalls, and two memorable games. I'm just sayin'.

* Rookie's note: You can use the word "Giontastic," but don't act like you invented it.